The Worst Day of the Year, Or the Most Heartless Thing Said to Me All Year

Date: January 30 2006

Time: 2:58pm

Heard: "So........ what are you doing on Valentine's Day......?"

My Response: "Nothing. Giving blood." (Followed by tears.)

What Lisa might as well have said: "So..... you're still single?"

(Actually, it wasn't so bad at all, but much more funny. There weren't any tears, I just thought it would be funny to quote and make Lisa feel really guilty. In fact, her husband has to be out of town that week and this was her preface to asking if I wanted to hang out on the 14th. It's going to be a night of death.... by chocolate, that is.)

My Joy and My Inspiration

My favorite thing is to go where I've never been.

- Diane Arbus (1923-1971)

The Hardest Part (A Sort of Therapy for Me)

The Hardest Part - Coldplay

And the hardest part
Was letting go, not taking part
Was the hardest part

And the strangest thing
Was waiting for that bell to ring
It was the strangest start

I could feel it go down
Bittersweet, I could taste in my mouth
Silver lining the cloud
Oh and I
I wish that I could work it out

And the hardest part
Was letting go, not taking part
You really broke my heart

And I tried to sing
But I couldn't think of anything
And that was the hardest part

I could feel it go down
You left the sweetest taste in my mouth
You're a silver lining the clouds
Oh and I
Oh and I
I wonder what it's all about
I wonder what it's all about

Everything I know is wrong
Everything I do, it just comes undone
And everything is torn apart

Oh and it's the hardest part
That's the hardest part
Yeah that's the hardest part
That's the hardest part

Mizar Helmet Lice

Who knew that the letters of my first and last name could be rearranged to form at least 500 anagrams? Yesterday's Site of the Day has an anagram generator.... just in case you want to know what your names spell too!

Here's some more of mine.....

Maize hermit cell
Maize chill meter
Hell metric maize
Maize retch me ill
Haze metric me ill
Haze mimic teller
Czar theme millie

Why I Love Music So Much

There's something about hearing songs that relate to your situation. At times they confirm exactly what you've been feeling, and sometimes they may help you to see things from an angle which you had previously missed. Damien Rice's music does that for me - it's full of so much raw emotion and helps me to deal with my own. Allow me to introduce to you his songs "Delicate" (which I can relate to very well) and "Volcano" (which helps me see things from another perspective). To me, Delicate is the She Said and Volcano is the He Said. Both are helpful because they help me grieve a loss. Of course, the music adds so much to the lyrics, but the lyrics are enough.

Delicate

we might kiss
when we are alone
when nobody’s watchin’
we might take it home
we might make out
when nobody's there
it's not that we're scared
it's just that it's delicate
so why d’ya fill my sorrow
with the words you've borrowed
from the only place you've known
why d’ya sing hallelujah
if it means nothin’ to ya
why d’ya sing with me at all?
we might live
like never before
when there's nothin’ to give
how can we ask for more?
we might make love
in some sacred place
that look on your face
is delicate
so why d’ya fill my sorrow
with the words you've borrowed
from the only place you've known
why d’ya sing hallelujah
if it means nothin’ to ya
why d’ya sing with me at all?

Volcano

don't hold yourself like that you'll hurt your knees
i kissed your mouth & back that's all i need
don't build your world around volcanoes melt you down
what i am to you is not real
what i am to you you do not need
what i am to you is not what you mean to me
you give me miles and miles of mountains
and i’ll ask for the sea
don't throw yourself like that in front of me
i kissed your mouth your back is that all you need?
don't drag my love around volcanoes melt me down
what i am to you is not real
what i am to you you do not need
what i am to you is not what you mean to me
you give me miles and miles of mountains
and i’ll ask for the sea
what i give to you is just what i’m going through
this is nothing new no no just another phase of finding
what i really need is what makes me bleed
and like a new disease she’s still too you to treat
volcanoes melt me down
she’s still too young
i kissed your mouth
you do not need me

Damien Rice's music can be found at www.damienrice.com. His cd "O" is one of the best I own.

Ode to the Nice Girl

Because it's copyrighted, I won't reprint it here..... but check out this link to read an Ode to the Nice Girl - written because a nice girl finally snapped. I found it on the Best of Craigslist.

Hmmmm..... is it obvious that I've been burned recently?